Tom’s Parenting Quotes

Sounds like one of us has a problem

Don’t make me get the beating stick

I’ll leave you here with Dr. Didi to talk about your new boyfriend

What could possibly go wrong?

This is why American healthcare is so expensive

Don’t make this an ER night

Diplo says ‘no bedtime for you!’

“loud” is a judgement call

Well, the good news is I know just what needs to be done… (Subungal Hematoma)

You could get your GED and go to Bellevue college…college boys…wait I shouldn’t say that, no college boys

What girl doesn’t love a wu-tang shirt!

I got all this fish for $3 because it’s the part nobody else wants-they asked if I wanted the head too, I said ‘next time’